Worried about a “loose vagina”? Let’s debunk the myths. Your vagina is elastic and can stretch and contract. Learn how age, childbirth, and other factors affect it, and discover exercises to strengthen your pelvic floor.
There’s no such thing as a permanently loose or stretched-out vagina. Your vagina’s elastic, which means it can stretch to accommodate something as big as a baby – but it can also snap back into its former shape.
Having kids and aging can def weaken the vaginal walls, but that’s not the end of the story for your precious cargo.
So, let’s bust the myth about the muff once and for all because your V deserves better. We’ll cover what to know about vaginal contraction and expansion.
Hooha, vayjayjay, cha-cha – whatever cringy word or pet name you wanna use, don’t do your vagina the disrespect of calling yourself “loose.”
Your vagina can change over time due to age, childbirth, and penetration, but it can’t lose its elasticity for good. Like a rubber band, the muscles expand and contract over time.
Keep in mind that calling a vagina “loose” has its roots in sex shaming. The word has been used as an insult to women who had sex with more than one partner – as in, “she’s loose.” (Yes, The Scarlet Letter or Easy A prob is still alive and well today, unfortunately.)
But in the end, it doesn’t matter who you sleep with – or how often. Getting down can’t stretch your coochie out forever.
A note on vaginal “tightness”
FYI: If you’re feeling excessive tightness during penetration, this may signal another issue.
Normally, your vaginal muscles relax when you get horny. So if that’s not happening, you might feel anxious, you might not be turned on, or there may be another mental or emotional issue at play here.
Super tight vaginal muscles can have sex painful or even impossible. It could also be a sign of vaginismus. Either way, vaginal tightness, and vaginismus are treatable.
If you’re having a prob with tightness, make an appointment with your OB-GYN. They might recommend pelvic floor exercises, vaginal dilator therapy, or Botox to relax the muscles. They may also recommend chatting with a sex therapist or another mental health pro about any concerns you may have.
People, places, and pu$$ies have a lot in common – they all change over time.
Getting older and giving birth will alter your vagina’s elasticity. Here’s the deal.
Childbirth
If you’ve had more than one vaginal birth, congrats – you’re a trooper. You’re also more likely to have weaker vaginal muscles as a result.
Since the muscles stretch quite a bit to let your babe pass through the birth canal, you might notice that your vagina does have a “looser” feeling in the days following delivery. That’s totes normal, and not a reason for concern. (It is a reason, however, to side-eye any nurse who tries to slip you a “husband stitch.”)
Your vagina will start to return to its normal a few days afterward. Though it won’t necessarily snap right back to its original shape, it can over time. In the end, everyone’s different.
It’s worth noting that people who undergo 2nd- or 3rd-degree perineal lacerations – tears that occur when a baby’s head emerges from the vagina – may require laceration repair. If these repairs aren’t don’t correctly, they might contribute to changes in the muscle integrity of the vagina.
Age
Most of the time, vaginas start to shift elasticity around age 40 or when estrogen levels begin to drop. During the perimenopausal stage, you might notice your vaginal tissue become:
- drier
- thinner
- less acidic
- less elastic
These changes may become more noticeable as you enter full-on menopause.
We don’t have any evidence to suggest that having any amount of sex can make your vagina “loose.”
When you have sex or have penetration of any kind, your vagina gets wet via its natural lubrication process. The muscles then expand to fit the penis, sex toy, etc.
Afterward, your vagina will snap back into shape.
So, your vag can’t stretch out forevs. But since its muscles *can* weaken, strengthening them through targeted exercises can change the way it feels for you.
- bladder
- small intestine
- rectum
- uterus
When your pelvic floor muscles weaken, some undesirable effects might happen, such as:
- a constant feeling that you need to pee
- accidentally peeing (especially when laughing, sneezing, etc.)
- experiencing pelvic pain
- experiencing pain during sex
It can also prevent the risk of pelvic organ prolapse (POP). POP is what can happen when the pelvic muscles weaken enough to allow one or more organs (like the womb or bladder) to slip out of place into the vagina.
If you experience a lot of urinary leakages, though, there might be something more that needs to be addressed than pelvic floor dysfunction. So talk to a doc to know for sure.
It’s no secret that vaginas are strong – but just how burly can yours get? Doing these exercises will strengthen your pelvic floor, support your organs, and may help restore your vagina’s elasticity.
So, think of it like hitting the gym – but for your vagina.
Kegel exercises
Whether from your mom, your gynecologist, or your 2004 copy of Cosmopolitan, you’ve probably heard about Kegels before. And that’s because they work! (Thanks, Arnold Kegel.)
To get started, you’ll first get a feel for your pelvic floor muscles. A solid way to do this is to deliberately stop the flow of your pee mid-stream. If you can do it, you did it with support from your pelvic floor muscles.
If you’re struggling to pull it off, don’t fear – you can strengthen them. The point is to just get a feel for what muscles you’ll need to work.
Now that you know what muscles to squeeze, here’s what to do:
- Pick a comfy starting position. A lot of people like to lie on their back to do Kegels, but you can technically do it in any position.
- Tighten those muscles. Squeeze your pelvic floor muscles and hold for at least 5 seconds. Then relax for 5 secs.
- Watch your form. Isolation is key, baby. Take care not to squeeze your butt, thighs, or abs as you work your pelvic floor.
- Repeat. Repeat this at least 5 times in a row. Gradually, you can work up to 10 secs.
Pelvic tilt exercises
Pelvic tilt exercises can help strengthen the pelvis as well as shift it back into its ideal position. As a bonus, some people notice diminished lower back pain as a result.
Here’s how:
- Find a wall. Stand with your shoulders and booty against it. Keep your legs straight but not locked, with your knees relaxed.
- Suck in. Draw your belly button toward your spine. As you do this, you’ll notice your back start to straighten and flatten against the wall.
- Hold it. Pull your belly button in as much as possible and hold this position for at least 4 seconds.
- Repeat. Repeat at least 5 times. Over time, you can work up to holding this for 10 seconds.
Vaginal cones
To get a good workout, you don’t need equipment – but it can def help.
A vaginal cone is shaped like a tampon and weighted down. When you put it in your vagina and use your muscles to hold it in place, you’re doing strength training 101 on your vag.
Vaginal cones are often used to treat urinary incontinence and other probs that can come with pelvic floor dysfunction. Still, we need more research to understand how well they work.
You can find a cone at your local drugstore or online. Always follow the instructions on your unique cone. But in general, here’s how to do it:
- Insert the cone. Start with the lightest cone. With practice, you can work your way up to heavier ones. Relax and gently insert the cone like you would a tampon.
- Squeeze the muscles. Use your vaginal muscles to hold it in place. Repeat for about 15 mins 2 times a day.
- Work up to heavier cones. As you get stronger, you can work your way up to heavier cones – and stronger pelvic floor muscles.
Neuromuscular electrical stimulation (NMES)
NMES works by sending an electric current to a muscle group as a method to help strengthen it. You can do this at home or visit a doctor for it.
It works by inserting a probe into your pelvic floor. Then, the electric pulses will help the muscles release and contract.
In a small 2020 study, researchers found that 5 rounds of NMES significantly improved pelvic floor muscle contraction in postpartum subjects. We may need more research to know just how effective NMES is, but it’s def not a bad addition to the manual exercises above.
Don’t believe the myth: A loose vagina isn’t really a thing. Your vagina’s elasticity can shift over time with age and childbirth, and its muscles can weaken, but that’s not permanent. You can also always do exercises to strengthen your pelvic floor and vaginal muscles.
If you’re worried about your vaginal muscle strength, visit a gynecologist to discuss it. And since issues related to sex can often be emotional or psychological, you may want to visit a therapist or another mental health professional.